my so called work life

my work life really is a cross between 

the office and the big bang theory 

no it isn't really funny in real life

conversation one

me:  "what does the bound mean?"

him: "it sets the upper or lower bound of the alarm for the specific parameters that the user has determined that will appropriately reflect the then current conditions that will need to be measured showing the status of the perfusion of the patient" (and correct grammer is the then, not a typo)

me: "so what you are trying to tell me is that the bound means the limit of the alarm"

him: "well it isn't a limit, its a bound"

me: "that means the same thing as a limit" 

conversation two

me: "so if i download the trial product on april 29, 2011  it will expire on april 30, 2011?"

him: "yes, we decided on a 30 day fixed date"

me: "no, we decided on they could have the trail for 30 days before needing to get a upgraded version"  (which don't even get me started on the process of the downloading or the upgraded part)

him: "no, we decided that it was a fixed 30 days"

me: "what product have you ever downloaded that said you had 30 days and it expired the next day?"

conversation three

him: "we need to figure out how to lock a starting date on the download"

me: "what?!, and why?!"

him: "people may backdate their computer in order to prevent the trial from expiring"

(actually not a bad idea, especially if they knew what they had to do to renew or get an upgraded version)

lessons learned so far:

business and research don't mix

old business and new business don't mix

wear ponytails to prevent me from pulling out all my hair